Interpersonal effectiveness

Our efforts to manage our own emotions are frequently challenged by our interactions with other people. Sometimes this leads us to behave impulsively or to explode, damaging our relationships. Other times we can fail to speak up assertively for what we need, which can lead to resentment or misunderstandings later. This course is about empowering us to handle interpersonal situations more effectively. This course invites you to reflect on the myths that hold you back in relationships and teaches you skills to be more assertive. We will talk about how to prepare for difficult conversations by creating scripts and anticipating pushback. These flexible and scientifically supported dialectical behavior therapy skills will help you to have clearer communication and more fulfilling relationships.


The next course starts Thursday 24th February from 7.30-9.30 GMT; 2.30-4.30 Eastern; 11.30-1.30 Pacific time and runs for 6 weeks.


Now £240 / $330

If you would like to attend this course but are not able to pay the full fee please contact me and we will try to work something out. Sign up here.

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What will I have to do?

You will attend a 2-hour session each week and complete homework between sessions – this usually takes between 20 minutes and an hour. You will be invited to join a slack channel where additional resources will be posted and you will be invited to ask any questions that you have.

What do you do in a group meeting?

We start with a mindfulness exercise, then in each session after the first we would go through the homework and discuss each of our experiences with it. Then we would have a 5-10 minute break. After the break, we would learn a new skill in one of the areas I describe above.

Is this group therapy?

No, its learning new skills. I’m here to facilitate learning, on the understanding that we are peers that are seeking to learn these skills together. Each participant is an expert in their life, and will have a different relationship to the skills. This group is about learning more options for dealing with emotions and the challenges that we face in life.

Do I need to have a diagnosis to come to this group?

Absolutely not. DBT assumes that some people have a harder time coping with emotions than others, and managing impulses or behaviours. It suggests some of this is biological, but some comes from an invalidating social environment. Sadly, many of us live within one of those! Especially if we are queer, sex workers, people of colour, disabled etc.

Who will be there?

The group will have no more than 20 participants. If more than 20 people are interested in attending then a second group will be set up.

Who is this for?

This course is for people who are interested in developing resilience, living authentically and improving their relationship with their emotions and their body.

Who is this course not for?

People that want quick fixes, people that don’t want to do homework or practice skills and people that will judge the life choices of others in the group.

What will the interpersonal effectiveness course cover?

Week 1 – Orientation and mindfulness

This is all about understanding the DBT approach, the rules of skills groups and the approach that DBT takes to mindfulness.

Week 2 – Barriers to interpersonal effectiveness & interpersonal myths

This week is all about what gets in the way of interpersonal effectiveness, including some of the myths that we hold.

Week 3 – Interpersonal Priorities and Validation

This week is all about working out what you want from an interpersonal situation, and how to validate yourself and others.

Week 4 – Asking for what you want & coping with pushback

This week is about what to do if the objective is the most important priority.

Week 5 – GIVE and FAST

This week focuses on what to do if your self respect or the relationship is the most important priority.

Week 6 – Dime game and ending destructive relationships

This is all about working out how intensely to ask for something (or say no) and how to end relationships that have become destructive.